Destiny Untold
by Sefie Lynne tilmitt
Summary: Looking for a place she truely belongs,Sierra Loire transfers to Balamb Garden. There she finds her fate, and many unexpected secrets. Her past,present and future rely on one man...Can he save her from a life of torment, experiments, and being a specimen?
1. Default Chapter

_I gritted my teeth against the pain. It was so immense I couldn't stand it. I screamed out, knowing no one was even going to hear me. The only thing around me was swallowing, thick darkness. It seemed to go on forever. I was alone, all alone. Forever. What did I do to deserve this? How did I get here? The air around me was cold and seemed to ripple. Echoes. I strained my ears to hear. _

_"Sierra."__ The voice was kind. Familiar. It was dad. Laguna Loire. _

_"Sierra!"__ Then a colder voice. Cold, but still caring. It sounded somewhat recognizable as well. Then sis. _

_"Sierra, wake up." _

_Foot steps.__ I got to my feet. They were coming for me. They had to be. I was soon going to be out of this torturous nightmare, and back home. I felt something sharp digging into my shoulders. I pulled away. _

_"Mom?__ Dad? Sis?" I asked fearfully. _

_I felt someone breathing down my neck. I stumbled away. I was being watched. I could feel it. I trembled. I felt as if all the heat had been sucked away. It was chilling. I was dizzy. Everything was spinning. I tried to cry out. I was so terrified. Noooooo.. I felt the power close in on me, enveloping me in inky, inescapable darkness._

           I realized I was still in Trabia Garden, in my dorm where I belonged. Not in that place of horrid darkness. I glanced out the window. Pink and orange tinged the bright red sun-rise sky. I stretched. No use in even trying to go back to sleep now. My radio was still on blaring Dashboard Confessional. I got up and stretched, pulling off my purple silk pajamas and putting on a rumpled blue shirt that was way to big for me (Dad used to wear it when he and mom had first met.) and cargo jeans. I put on my bright tie-dyed socks and my white Sketchers sneakers. Today was the day I was transferring to Balamb. I fidgeted nervously with my backpack. My stuff was already packed on the train. My friend Selphie was already at Balamb. She had transferred only two weeks ago. Part of me was glad to be going, but the other part was really gonna miss Trabia. "Will Sierra Loire please come to the front gates?" I wouldn't look back as I left. "Bye, Sierra!" I heard someone call. It was Sarah, my only other friend. 

"I'll write to you if you write to me. Keep me updated on anything that's happening at Trabia." 

I hugged her. 

"I will. Thanks, Sierra. See ya around. Ya gotta go, or you'll be late! You wouldn't want that, would you?" 

"I guess not. Bye, Sarah." I waved as I walked backwards over to the train.  
  
Sarah looked at her watch and dashed off. The minute I got on the train I opened my laptop.  
  
S_Loire- Anyone there?  
  
Sarah21- yes, my amigo. Sup? Ur on so soon. Guess u really do miss us ^.^  
  
Sefie_Star- hi hi! I can't wait till you get to Balamb! There's all kinds of people here. I've already made friends! There's Zell Dintch. He's really nice. He loves the cafeteria hot dogs, but they're always out when he gets there. Then. let's see. Quistis. She's an instructor. You'll like her! She's really great at Triple Triad, too. And Seifer! He tries to be arrogant and mean, but I think if someone would just talk to him he'd be much nicer. Fuijin hangs out with him, but she can't really have a conversation with him. She only speaks in one word sentences, like "ANGER." Squall Leonheart doesn't really seem to have friends, so I'm gonna try to help! I think once he's melted his layer of ice, he'd be a really good friend!  
  
S_Loire- Squall. The name sounds familiar. Did he ever go to Trabia Garden?  
  
Sefie_Star- Don't think so. But I'll introduce you to them when you get here! I promise!  
  
Sarah21- Ar there any cute guys there?  
  
Sefie_Star- I dunno. I never really thought of boys as cute. Just as people.  
  
Sarah21- For really? Ya gotta be kidding me!  
  
S_Loire- boyz r stupid.  
  
Sarah21- whatever ^^; I don't understand u peeps. gotta jet, it's time 4 class. See ya!  
  
Sarah21 logged off.  
  
Sefie_Star- I can't wait till you get here! Bye bye!  
  
Sefie_Star logged off.  
  
I shut my laptop. I'd just stick with Selphie. I hesitated. Maybe I should just go home. I already felt out of place, and I wasn't even there yet.__


	2. Seifer

I got off the train. So this was Balamb Garden.. I hoped it was really as cool as it looked. I bit at my finger nails. Please let people like me.. Selphie bounded up to me. 

"Goodie! Hi, Sierra! It's so great to see you! Come, on, I'll introduce you to everyone." 

Why did I have a feeling it was gonna be a long day? It had only been a quarter of an hour since Selphie had begun her tour of the garden. 

"Sefie, just show me the dorms. I wanna get unpacked. Okay?" 

"I haven't finished though!" Selphie said, disappointed. 

"Seriously. And I'm really ready for a shower and a nap after I unpack. Can we do this tomorrow?" 

"Okay. See ya around, Sierra!" Selphie skipped off.  
I sighed. She was a great friend, but sometimes she really got on my nerves. I had my suitcase in one hand, and my backpack was on the other. In my backpack were my most prized possessions. A picture of mom was among them. I shuddered as I realized mom died because she was bringing me into this world. I brought her out of it. It was such a terrible thought. I blocked it from my mind. I know dad didn't blame me for it, but I could still tell how awful he felt. If I feel like this, imagine what it was like for dad. I shuddered. I ran smack into someone. 

"Hey! Watch where you're going!" said a voice angrily. 

"S-Sorry. Wasn't paying attention." I said quickly. 

"Obviously." 

"Um. hi. I'm Sierra." I said, trying to get on more friendly terms. 

"Seifer." He said. 

I decided this guy truly fitted Sefie's description. I just had to try to be his friend. He really needed one. I looked him over. He wasn't the best, but he was decently cute. He had eyes that were startlingly bright blue. They looked like ice with a blue beam of light shining through them. He was tall, and I saw he had a gun. He looked like a guy with an ego to big to carry. If his head got any bigger he would probably float away. This was gonna be tough, being his friend. "Nice to meet you!" I smiled, and held out my hand.

 He nodded at me, but didn't shake my hand. He raised his eyebrows. 

"You too." 

"So.um." He sensed how uncomfortable I was, or so I assumed, because he relaxed a little. 

"So you're new here?" he asked. 

"Yup." I smiled. 

At least he was trying to start a conversation. 

"Where did you transfer from?" 

"Trabia Garden." 

"Did you like it there?"

"It was great. But I felt really out of place there. I only had two real friends. Selphie and Sarah. Selphie moved here. Then I felt more out of place than ever. I guess destiny put me here." 

I shrugged. 

"You believe in destiny?" 

"Yeah."

 "I think destiny stuff is a load of $H!T. You set your own course. Besides, if destiny did exist, the things it does are so cruel I would turn on it anyway." 

"Everything happens for a reason." 

I winced, thinking of the photo of my mother. He glanced at me, an unspoken question. 

"What?" I asked, trying to keep the sadness out of my voice. 

"So called 'destiny' has been cruel to you as well?"

 I nodded. Not only did this guy have an ego, he could read my mind, my expression, or both. I wasn't sure. Dangerous combination.

"Then why do you believe in it?" 

Because destiny wanted mom to be in heaven. Heaven is a better place than earth. God wanted her there with him. "Because. Just because, Seifer." 

He took the hint. 

"Sorry. Hey, do you know where the dorms are?" 

"No." Actually I did, but I found him to be quite charming company. 

"Need some help finding them?" 

"Sure." I grinned. We set off at a slow walk. 

"So you've asked me lots of questions. Tell me about yourself." 

I can't believe my theory was always 'avoid boys, they're just idiots'. This one interested me instead of bothering me. "What's to tell? I'm a student at Balamb Garden. Dumb, boring Balamb Garden." 

"Well? How old are you? When did you move to Balamb? Have you been to any other Gardens?" 

boys are simple minded. If he couldn't think up questions himself, I'd think them up for him. 

"I'm 18. I came to Balamb as soon as I was old enough to join. Never been to any other gardens."

 "I'm 17. Oh, by the way, my last name's Loire."

 He looked away, then did a double take.

 "You know Leonheart?" 

That was mom's maiden name. How did he know it? Why did he ask? 

"My mother's name is-- was Raine Leonheart before she married. My father is Laguna Loire. Why?" 

"A student here is named Squall Leonheart. His name was Loire, but he changed it. You look a heck of a lot alike." "Squall Leonheart? Never met him. But then again, I have about eight GFs junctioned right now." 

He nodded. 

"Didn't expect you too have heard of him. Be pleased you haven't. He and I aren't the best of friends, put it that way." "Oh." 

I nodded, realizing we were at the dorms and stopped. I looked at my watch. 7 o'clock. 

"Well, g'night Seifer."

 "Good night. See ya around." 

He turned around and disappeared around the corner. Maybe he was gonna be easier to be friends with than I thought. 


	3. Training Center

The next afternoon (Saturday, my favorite day of the week, by the way) I headed toward the training center. I carried my sword with me. I was very proud of it; it was 5 foot 5. Approximately my height. If you ask me, that's one hell of a sword. I know, it's arrogance. But I'm not a humble person, am I? Walking to the training center, I tried to scope out the people, see who everyone was, and soak in the surroundings. When I arrived at the training center, I thought I was the only one there. I looked around. There was one guy there. I walked up to him. 

"Hello!" I smiled.

 But when I looked at his face I was shocked. He had dark brown hair and eyes of ice. They were blue, and cold. He wore the exact same facial expression I did when I met my arch enemy at Trabia. I was basically looking at a boy form of me. He looked nearly identical to me! Same eye color (expect mine weren't so cold ^^;), and same hair, only mine's down to my waist. He was about 5 eight. Three inches taller than me. 

"Yo." He said, glaring at me.

 I had heard that voice before! In my dream! 

"Um." I was very uncomfortable under his gaze. 

"I'm Squall Leonheart." He nodded, not even offering his hand.

This was the guy Seifer had spoken about. He wasn't joking. Squall did look a lot like me. I chose my words carefully. "I'm Laguna Loire's daughter, Sierra." Squall gave me an evil look before his eyes shadowed. 

"So he got remarried."

 "Huh?" I asked. He knew something about dad. 

"To have a kid, Laguna must've remarried." Squall said darkly, his tone giving away his churning emotions. 

"My mother is Raine Loire." I said, wondering what in the world he was talking about. 

He stiffened and simply walked away. This guy confused me pretty deeply. It kinda disturbed me. How did he know dad? 

"Hey Sierra." I turned around. It was Seifer.

"Hi, Seifer."

"Sup?" he looked at me strangely. 

"Nothing much, you?"

 "You look kinda shaken. Are you sure nothing's up?" he asked. 

"I'm fine." 

"Allright. Hey, my friends Fuijin and Raijin want to meet you." 

"Okay." I nodded, smiling, trying to push my encounter with Squall to the back of my mind. A hard thing to do. 

"I see you've met Squall." 

"Yeah." 

"He's a stick in the mud. Ignore him if he was rude to you."

 "He just needs a friend." 

Even more than you. You're not really as bad as Selphie let on. 

"People would be his friend if he would chill his attitude a little." Retorted Seifer. 

I shrugged. 

"Whatever." 

Seifer grinned 

"You should see yourself through my eyes. That was Squall speaking, not you. He does the cold shoulder, yeah-whatever thing all the time. You look so much alike it's ridiculous." 

Maybe… Nah. No way. 

"Guess so." I frowned, hoping he'd take the hint and drop the subject. 

"Well, it's lunch time. If you want to you can join Fuijin, Raijin, and I." 

"'kay." 

He started to walk away, and then looked over his shoulder.

 "Are you coming with or not?" I nodded and ran to catch up with him. 

"When do we get to go on SeeD missions?" 

"Soon enough." 

Guess he wasn't very talkative today. I felt a chill go down my spine, as if someone was watching me. I turned around, but no one was there. I looked back and Seifer had already left. I was alone with the feeling someone was watching me. My insides squirmed. This place was creeping me out. Why do I feel like someone is watching me? No one is in the training center but me. I'm alone. Right? Maybe that's what makes it so creepy. Being alone. Realizing if something happens, no one will be there to help. No one can see you, hear you, help you, possibly save you. What a morbid thought… I fled the training center, catching up with Seifer. He was half way down the hall already.

 "Did you feel that?" I asked nervously.

 "You believe in destiny **and you're paranoid? You're something, Sierra." **

He shook his head. 

"No! Really! It felt like I was being watched!" 

He raised his eyebrows at me, giving me the 'you're-crazy-paranoid-or-both' look. 

"Whate-" I stopped myself. That was Squall's word. "Never mind." 

We stayed silent all the way to the cafeteria. I saw Sefie waving at me to sit at her table with a guy with blonde spiky hair eating a hotdog, a girl with a pink outfit on (I think that was instructor Trepe), and a new girl with black hair down to her shoulders. I shook my head at her.

 'Sorry!' I mouthed. 

She shook her head, looked at Seifer, who was standing next to me, and snickered. Oh, that jerk. I went and sat down opposite Seifer. At that table was a boy who didn't look like the sharpest tool in the shed, and a girl with an eye patch over her eye. 

"Hello." I smiled. The girl nodded. 

"So you're the new kid! We just sorta wanted to get introduced to ya, ya know? I'm Raijin! Who are you?" 

"Sierra." I said. 

"FUIJUN." The girl said. 

Sefie was right. It would be really hard to talk to this girl. I thought Selphie was joking when she had said Fuijin only spoke in one word sentences. 

"Nice to meet you two." 

I nodded. All through lunch Fuijin didn't talk, Raijin wouldn't shut up, and Seifer hardly spoke at all. New resolution: From now on, hang out with Seife, talk to Seifer only when he's not with his friends. You couldn't get a word in between Raijin's speeches. Did he ever take a breath? I got away from them with a hurried goodbye and walked thoughtfully back to the dorms, the feeling followed me that I was being followed. Did it ever go away?`


	4. Taking A Chance

"Sierra, I'm pleased that you have already been certified as a SeeD. I can dispatch you immediately on a mission. I have looked into your missions file. You have a very high success rate. Higher than most, matter of fact. 95% of your missions have achieved without flaw. That's why I intend to send you on this mission. You are to enter Esthar. There is a Galbadian base. They have some sort of weapon-like Guardian Force. They call it Griever II. It junctions itself to you. This GF is similallar to the original one that Ultemecia junctioned Griever that made her evil. So, be warned, it will most likely attempt to junction itself to you. If you get caught, Galbadia will wipe your memories and train you as a Galbadian Soldier. Be careful. Your objective is to destroy Griever II. I have no further information. Your partners will be Selphie Tilmitt, Squall Leonheart, and Seifer Almasy. Any questions?" 

"No sir." I nodded stiffly. 

"Good luck to you and your comrades." 

"Thank you, sir." 

"And by the way, before you leave tomorrow, there is an end of term party. I request everyone's attendance."

"Yessir."  
  
                                              ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~  
  
I took a look in the mirror. I didn't look like myself. My long, straight brown hair was hanging down my back. I had always worn it in a ponytail or a braid. I always, also, wore jeans, a t-shirt, and sneakers. I felt so awkward. I wore a very short, strapless dark red dress that ended about four inches above my knees. I had on red high heels and silver hoop earrings. It was the first time in a long time I'd worn makeup. I wanted to go, but part of me was scared. For some reason I was afraid of getting hurt. I wasn't quite so plain as I normally was. I was afraid that if a guy from Balamb danced with me, and then later asked me out, and I fell in love with him, he would love me for my appearance, and if I dropped my appearance, he would dump me. If that happened, I probably wouldn't be able to force myself to dance with or date a guy again. 

"Sierra! You ready?" asked a voice outside my door. 

"Just a minute." I put on a silver locket and opened the door. Sefie stood there with Raijin. 

"You look great!" she exclaimed. 

"Thanks. You too." 

The three of us took off walking down the hall. Sefie looked over at me. 

"Poor Xu has to drag Squall to the dance." 

"He's… different." I was thinking about the training center. 

"Understatement, ya know? He's cold, man!" Raijin said. 

"He probably has a reason." Sefie commented thoughtfully, and added, "Sierra, why don't you have a date?" 

"Because. I just don't." 

"Well, lotsa people will probably ask you to dance, so it doesn't matter." 

"Sefie, do you always look at the glass half full?" I asked, a little annoyed. 

"I guess." 

Nothing was said the rest of the way to the dance, and when we got there we kinda drifted apart in the crowd. For the first few minutes, while everyone was talking and there was no music going yet, I sat alone on one of the bleachers. I sat there and thought about the last time I went to one of these dances. I shook the thought out of my head. I had to think not all guys were the same. I hoped so, at least. I watched the regular lights dim, and the gymnasium lit up with softly pulsing string-lights. They flashed in rhythm in time to the beat. That must've taken a little while to set up. It was quite pretty. It couldn't seem as beautiful as it truly was, because I hated being alone. Maybe that's dumb of me, but I'm miserable alone. Streamers danced in the breeze through the open window. Little paper hearts hung from the ceiling. The hardwood floor was spotless, reflecting the lights strung out all over the walls and the couples now gathering there. 

"Hey Sierra." Said Seifer cheerfully. 

"Yo." 

"Hey, why aren't you with your date? Are you feeling okay?"  
  
(SEIFER'S POV!!!)  
  
Woah. I can't believe her date isn't afraid of losing her to another guy. She's beautiful! 

"I don't have a date." She said quietly. 

What the hell?!

"Oh." 

She looked away from me, and I cursed myself for being so stupid as to assuming she had a date. 

"It doesn't matter though." Her voice was low, as if veiling emotion. 

"I'm sorry." 

"For what?" 

"... Assuming you had a date." "

.Whatever." 

"Hey." 

here goes. 

"Um. would you like to dance?" 

I saw the hesitation in her eyes. Like afraid to dance with me, past memories surfacing.  
  
(SIERRA'S POV)  
  
No. I won't do that. I don't know you well enough. Last time I let myself loose and truly fell in love, I got hurt. I'll only get hurt. I can NOT, under ANY circumstances say. 

"Yeah." 

I smiled. Tonight, I felt like taking a chance. I let Seifer pull me by the arm down onto the hardwood floor. Was this the big mistake? Had I gotten myself in for another heartache? Or had I determined a little of my destiny? I placed my arms around his neck. I listened to the song that seemed to envelope us. It was 'Here Without You', by 3Doors Down. About halfway through the song unconsciously I laid my head on his shoulder. Maybe I had made the right choice. Maybe. Hopefully. There were 12 other slow songs played at the dance, and Seifer asked me to dance every one of them. Possibly. taking this chance was a good thing. 


	5. Possession

I looked out the window, thought consuming me, somewhat worried about the upcoming mission. I was wearing a long sleeved, hooded Linkin Park shirt and cargo jeans, with part of my hair in a ponytail, the other half down. Seifer kept his distance, which didn't surprise me. Selphie sat next to me, beaming as usual, and Seifer and Squall sat on opposite ends of the train car, shooting evil looks at each other. Men and their inflated egos… If looks could kill, they'd both be dead. I glanced at my laptop. 

S_Loire- Hello? 

Sarah21- yo! ~.^ 

S_Loire- Sup?

Sarah21- not a lot. I haven't got a single letter from you yet! (offended tone*) got a boyfriend yet?

S_Loire- Dunno

Sarah21- What's dat supposed to mean?

S_Loire- Means **I DUNNO.** I can't tell whether I have a boyfriend or not. I know I have a boy who's my friend, but I don't think he's my boyfriend… I dunno.

Sarah21- Hahaha… Sierra's got a boyfriend! Hahaha… : )

S_Loire- Shut up. Boyz suck. : P

Sarah21- (snickers*) whats his name?

S_Loire- none of ur bizness….

Sarah21- for really

S_Loire- Seifer Almasy

Sarah21- OMG?! Ur not joking?! Didn't sef say he wuz cold? How'd u thaw him out? I bow to you for having the guts to brave the ice monster!

S_Loire- He's not an ice monster! He's actually quite nice.

Sarah21- I thought u said boyz suck and boyz r stupid.

S_Loire- they do : P

Sarah21- Hahaha…. Whatever (grins evilly, smirking, laughing*) 

S_Loire- I'm on a mission so u just shut up fat head Sarah.

Sarah21- I'm hurt.

S_Loire- u'll hurt worse if u don't shut up about dim-witted sucky boyz 

Sarah21- I'll talk to you later, 'migo. 

S_Loire- bye

Sarah21 logged off

I sighed, annoyed, and shut my laptop. Sometimes Sarah could be so totally maddening… I groaned, frowning. It must be a headache. My mind felt blurry, like I was watching a movie instead of truly thinking, and I felt disconnected from the world. I felt my lips move, but it was all muddled. I couldn't compute a word I was saying, which seemed quite out of place, but my mind was so detached I couldn't figure out why. I pushed off the feeling, and for some reason terror rose on my throat. Suddenly everything was normal again. Everyone was looking at me, as I just noticed.

"What?"

"Sierra, what were you just saying?" 

Sefie looked scared, Seifer shocked, and Squall like he was ready to pull a limit break on me.

"I d-dunno…"

Seifer shook his head, got up, and walked over to her.

"Seriously?" his blue eyes were grim, and he seemed to be dreading my answer.

"Yes."

"What did it feel like?" 

"Like I was…" I searched for the right word, "being controlled. A puppet. Everything was blurry. I couldn't control myself, and I couldn't understand anything."

Selphie looked like she was going to pass out. 

"Sierra… you know what this means, don't you?"

"Uh… no?"

"That could mean… a sorceress…" she looked alarmed. 

Terror gripped my heart. My mind raced. Just like my dream… my nightmare… Was I a monster? I'm in SeeD, an organization designed to assassinate sorceresses… when I might've just gotten possessed by one? This must be a sick joke… it has to be… right?

"What did I say?" I was afraid of the response, but I had to know. 

"Wake up from your dream, my children. There is no cradle. Wake up from your dreams, fated children. The dream is not going. Arise. Discover the truth Burn with truth Scorch the world of evil. Burn with truth Set fire to the world of darkness. Goodbye, children,

From the days of destiny"

"… What does it mean?"

"You also said… 'Prepare for my reign, for it is coming. Then you shall have the fated choice, under which one path lies death but honor, the other power, life, and being cast away from all civilized humanity. It is each your choice to make. Only one path is correct. Soon you will meet me in my true form. Until then, I leave you with the choice…' And you snapped out of it."

"…" I had no idea what to say.  

"Let's not say anything about this to anyone." Sefie declared. 

Squall gave his affirmation, his eyes shaded. He seemed to be remembering things that were better left alone in the back of his memory. Seifer nodded vigorously. 

"It was probably nothing. As long as it never happens again, you're good to go, Sierra. Now, everyone promises that this info doesn't leave this train car?" she held out her hand. 

Seifer put his in, me next. Squall, detached, made sure his hand wasn't near the others, but at least he put his hand in at all. 

The train screeched to a stop, and everyone was silent as we filed off. A tall, thin girl with attractive blonde-brown hair and blue-gray eyes stood waiting for us.

"Hello. You must be the SeeDs from Balamb Garden?" she asked.

"Yes ma'am."

"Okay. I'm to lead you to the base. My name is Starla Irvette." 

"Nice to meet you, Starla."

"You as well." She smiled, and set off in long strides so we couldn't be spotted and identified by any Galbadian soldiers. It took about ten minutes to reach the base. I shrugged off the odd feeling in the pit of my stomach. When we arrived and went inside, Starla turned around abruptly, startled. 

"Did you feel that?" 

"Feel what?" I asked. 

"That… it was a wave of evil energy. It was radiating from something in the room. Didn't you feel it?" 

"No…"

I felt Seifer's eyes on me, and my face turned red at the unspoken accusation. He thought she was sensing me, didn't he? Why else would he stare at me? It isn't me! 

"Well, anyway," Starla shrugged, "We're here and that's what I was sent to make sure of." She saluted us, "Good luck on your mission, and I hope I see you soon. Bye."

"See ya." 

I turned away from Seifer, not sure what the emotions were churning inside. Was it anger? Anger that Seifer would even consider me evil? Fear? Fear of Seifer hating me because of the event? Or was it something else? I couldn't help but notice that the name Seifer kept popping up in nearly every thought. That would have to change. I scowled and closed my eyes. I hated it when things didn't make sense. 

"Well… um… we should all rest up before going to get briefed for more information."  Sefie declared. 

Without a word I turned towards a room and shut the door behind me. I fell backwards on the bed, and suddenly I realized exactly how exhausted I was. Whatever had happened had drained my energy completely and totally. I let a comforting sleep overtake me, and to my pleasure, I had no more dreams to haunt me. It had been quite a day… 


	6. Captured

(a/n: Sorry for the long delay… in updates! I have seriously been stuck! Only Lady Yunalesca88 inspired me to continue. Thanks, Lady Yunalesca88! Ur awesome! Don't own ff8, by the way.)

I closed my eyes, counting down from ten. I heard Seifer typing in the code. I was on seven. Sefie sucked in a breath. Four. I heard the thud of Squall's boots against the floor. Two… Seifer muttered impatiently. One. I ran through the now unlocked door, which had an auto-close function.

"Identification requested."

I scanned a fake I.D.

"Confirming… information processed."

I ran my hand along the wall, searching for the light switch. I felt uneasy. Distant shouts reached my ears. No! My friends had to be in trouble! I ran back to the door, which had been locked down. I pounded my fists into the glass door, pressing my face to it and watching in horror as Sefie frantically tried to use her nunchakus to fight off six soldiers.

Squall and Seifer were attacking them also, but I heard Sefie say, very faintly, 'Run! Go tell Headmaster Cid!' They were hesitant, but Sefie gave them a warning look. Seifer nodded worriedly, and Squall didn't move. Seifer grabbed Squall by the shirt collar and forcibly dragged him off. I couldn't decide if Squall was brave or just stupid, wanting to stay there with Sefie to protect her.

One of the soldiers looked up at me, where I'd stopped pounding on the glass. He gave me a rather toothy smirk and typed in the access code on the door. I was trapped. Trapped with no hope of escape. The door slid open and I fell forward. He twisted my arms behind my back.

"Quite the interesting specimen, aren't you…?" he whispered in my ear.

I said several obscenities, and he chuckled. "Get away from me you creep!" I hissed.

"You… are Sierra Loire. It's… leaked…just what you are. Come on. We'll see how Griever II reacts to sorceresses."

I gasped in pain as he put an Odine Bangle on me, pushing me away. I stumbled into a gargantuan sterile white room. The only color was a silver metal table and silver metal sliding doors. I closed my eyes, wincing as he shoved me onto the table and locked metal hand-cuff type things around my wrists and ankles and my waist, keeping my firmly locked in. I struggled, the cold hard metal biting into me. The soldier laughed again, and I turned my head towards the sliding doors. They were enormous… whatever would be coming through them would be enormous, too. The soldier left the room, chuckling coldly. There was a mechanic whirr and I had a bad feeling that the doors would soon be opening.

Then the most horrid-looking thing I'd ever seen came out. I gasped. It had grotesque wings, wet and slimy and purple, and it was surely 20 feet tall at least. Its wingspan looked about 50 feet, which was pretty freakin' scary when you're a seventeen-year-old girl who was 5' 5". It sniffed the air with it's blackish-purple snout and roared, crawling closer to me. I held my breath, and it clawed its way over to me. I screamed. I couldn't help it. It roared, this time in a most satisfied way, and I closed my eyes.

I felt its claw brush over me, leaving bleeding gashes, and it sounded angry this time. Very angry. There was a high-pitched sound like metal on metal, and its enormous claws went up to where its ears would be. The monster shrieked horribly in pain, dropping to four clawed feet and running to the open doors, which immediately closed before it could change its mind and come after me again. I was in so much pain I was nearly blind with it, and I squirmed and writhed. I even felt myself twitching. Great agony, such great agony… There were loud shouts everywhere.

"It was supposed to erase her memory, not hurt her!"

"Greiver II hasn't ever acted this way!"

"If GII killed our specimen--!"

"Stupid—"

"They'll come back for her. Best to launch an attack on Garden… The two men escaped… The blonde and the brown-headed ones. And they'll tell Cid."

"Yeah… best to kill them."

"The blonde has a soft spot for her… we should just wait for him to come for her. –Then- we can kill him."

"I've done some research… The brown-headed one's name is Squall Leonhart, and he's the son of Laguna and Raine Loire. The girl is the Loire's daughter."

"Loire and Leonhart? Two different last names? It doesn't add up."

"Squall changed his last name to his mother's maiden name."

"Ah… a rebel mad at his father."

"He'll come back for his sister."

"Does he know that's his sister?"

"Possibly. The blonde, Seifer Almasy, will most definitely come back."

I closed my eyes, in considerable pain. Don't hurt Seifer. Please don't hurt Seifer. I shut out the pain and let the peace and escape of sleep wash over me.


	7. Control

(a/n: no longer stuck! What a joyous day! Don't own ff8 or square or anything. Just this idea. And sierra and starla and sarah. Yep, own them too!)

I was wrapped in bandages. Bandages that used to be white but were now red with blood. My blood. I couldn't stand to look at myself, so horribly marred behind the bandages. Some things couldn't be bandaged, like my face, but huge what looked to me like giant band-aids covered my bloody right cheek. I hummed a catchy song I heard on the radio before, called 'Eyes on Me' by Julia Heartilly. I might as well try to be optimistic, even if nothing was really going well. It was pretty much the only way to ignore the fact in the back of my head that kept repeating itself over and over: I was most likely doomed to be a lab rat. A sorceress lab rat. That's when I heard it.

Sierra… remember me? It is I, Ultemekia… Do you wish to stay here, in pain, or will you submit to me and let me help you eskape?

_No, _I thought firmly, _You'll just hurt Seifer and Sefie and Squall and all my friends! I won't let you!_

_Oh, yes, you'll learn… After they run a few tests on you, or threaten to seal you, you will –beg- for my help. Let me kontrol you… just a while. You will be greatly repaid. I will not hurt your so kalled friends… _

_Bullcrap!_

_Insolent fool! You will sukkumb to my power! _

_Fat chance! Never!_

_I will kontrol you, and you will regret denying me! _

_You won't! I won't let you! They have an Odine Bangle on me!_

_Odine Bangle? Stop me? Hahaha… don't make me laugh, foolish little girl! _

_Odine Bangles…stop sorceress powers, and you're a sorceress…_

_I am a sorkeress from the future… My powers will not solely be suppressed by a peike of JEWELRY!_

_It's not jewelry… It's a weapon._

_A weapon against sorkeresses, like you. We are just alike…_

_We are NOTHING alike!_

_You are just… as evil… as me. _Each word was emphasized, and I burst into tears.

_I am NOT! I won't be like you! I got Seifer!_

_Seifer… foolish boy… he will be my sorkeress's knight…_

_He won't! Knock it off!_

_He will with the right… leverage. Persuasion. Like you. If I, let's say, possess you…I kan have total influenke over him. _

_…You wouldn't._

_Try me._

I closed my eyes, crying hard as I lost control of my body, my mind. It was like watching a movie. Ultemecia didn't release my body, but kept it still, pacified, waiting for Seifer to come for me. I felt like crying, but it was quite obvious it wasn't up to me anymore… I was no longer myself, but Ultemecia, evil sorceress of the future.

_(A/n: sorry, short chapter, but it seemed right to quit there…) _


	8. Disaster

(a/n:… I STILL don't own viii. If I did, Irvine would die, Selphie would end up with Squall, and Raine would still be alive.)

I was laying back against the table, Ultemecia waiting calmly and I miserably for Seifer to come. Assuming he would. I doubted it, deep down. Part of me didn't want him to come… if he did, we would –both- be dead meat. My vision had gone all psycho on me, so I could only see the floor. I watched a black pair of combat boots stumbling past me, the tip of a sword brushing the floor. It had to be Squall. Blood dripped on the floor after him, and I realized a soldier was leading him at gunpoint. I felt like crying again.

_Happy now? You've officially ruined my life. _

_Liberi Fatalli… The fated khildren will fall… one… by… one._

_…You mean Squall? And Seifer? And me?_

_Hahahaha…_

_Answer me!_

_It will be –I- asking questions now, Loire… -You- are no longer in kontrol. _

I waited helplessly. How long passed? Hours? Days? Years? I was exhausted but couldn't sleep. Ultemecia wouldn't let me. I begged her, over and over, just to let me sleep, to escape this monotony of not being in control. Then I saw it. A burst of light… where a window in the White Room had shattered. A gunblade had been stabbed through it. Seifer's gunblade. No, I wanted to scream, go back! But I couldn't…. I couldn't do –anything-.

"Sierra! Are you okay?!"

I felt Ultemecia make me smirk. I really hated her. "Sierra… this is not Sierra. This is… a shell… whikh Sierra used to inhabit. And now she is mine."

Seifer looked horrified. "Let her go!"

"No… not yet. I will, under the korrect… konditions."

"…Name it. Just don't hurt her, or I'll kill you myself."

Ultemecia tore me from the metal table, snapping the pieces metal that had held me in as if they were toothpicks. I tried to warn Seifer, but Ultemecia wouldn't let me. I felt myself walk out the door, looking strange with almost glowing eyes and strange wing-like things poking out of my back, wearing the tattered remains of a sweatshirt and cargo jeans. Seifer fearfully followed. I was forced to walk out of the facility, to the edge of a huge cliff, crater-like. Water washed against the cliff hundreds of feet below. I panicked, but Ultemecia didn't let me do anything. What was new.

"Bekome… My sorkeress knight. Or… well, you will see." She made me put one foot off the cliff.

"Don't hurt her." I could practically hear Seifer's mind working, trying to find a way out of this. But there –wasn't- a way out of this. I was dead or he was dead, either way.

"I will give you… a little while. Say, a day. I'll be waiting… right here. Tomorrow morning. Go. Make your dekision. If you don't kome back, then I will make her throw herself off the edge." I felt Ultemecia make me wave him nonchalantly off.

"I'll be back for you, Sierra. I promise." He backed off and then turned and ran.

_He'll never kome back._

_He will too, you snotfaced--  
Now, now, remember who's in kontrol…_

_Urgh…_

So I let her have me, at least for the moment.

(3rd Person Point of View!)

Seifer sat with his head in his hands, talking to his brother Landon.

"So what can I do, Landon?"

"…If you hurt her, it will also hurt the sorceress."

"No!" Seifer slammed his fist down. "I won't her get hurt! Damnit, don't you see that I love her?!"

"I do," Landon sighed, "But it's that or get her sealed. Which one?"

"Neither!"  
"…So many years at military school… and you're still a softy."

"I am not a softy!"

"Yes you are. Look at how you'll sacrifice everything for that Loire girl—"

"It's because I love her, like I told you! And if you'd get a heart, then maybe –you'd- know what it feels like, too!"

"…I'm coming with you. Just to negotiate with the sorceress."

"If you hurt her—"

"I know, I know. Calm down, Seifer!"

"Whatever." Seifer scowled distastefully. "But just… don't hurt her, Landon. She's all I got now."

(Sierra's Point of View Again )

I was so tired I wanted to scream. I hadn't slept in, what, four days, with constant exhaustion from being possessed. It was killing me, if Ultemecia didn't first. I watched the tide tumble in and out, in and out, over and over, the surf breaking and sending spray everywhere. It was a loooooooong way down… I didn't wanna face that, no way. But I didn't want Seifer to suffer, either. I saw to figures appear, and Ultemecia made me smile. A cold, evil smile that I couldn't pull off on my own.

"Seifer Almasy…. Who is it that you have brought with you?"

"….My name is Landon Almasy. I'm Seifer's older brother."

"And what is your khoice, Seifer?"

"I--"

Then, before I knew what was happening, I felt something sharp stab painfully into my stomach. Ultemecia and I screamed as one, and I realized Landon had stabbed me. Seifer cussed at Landon many, many times and then dropped down beside me, pulling me into his lap and tearing off part of his long white coat, wrapping it gingerly around my waist. Ultemecia lost her grip on me, and I groaned.

"How –dare- you hurt her?" Fire burned in his eyes as he looked up at Landon, who shrugged.

"It was all I could do, Seifer."

"Bull shit!"

He pulled me closer, and I shivered, cold and in serious pain. He put my head on his shoulder, cradling me back and forth.

"Go away, Landon. I'll deal with you later."

"But—"  
"I SAID GO AWAY!"

"Fine. I was just helping." Spat Landon, stomping off and reminding me of a little kid.

"Now, are you okay?" he used curaga on me.

"….Seifer…."

"Yeah… Yeah, what is it?"

I smiled weakly up at him. "…Thankyou… I love you."  
"I love you, too." He picked me up, carrying me gently somewhere… I didn't know where, seeing as my eyes were squeezed shut in pain.

"Omigosh!" Selphie exclaimed, "Is she okay?!"

"I don't know. If she keeps bleeding like this, no, she –won't- be okay…." He took the piece of white material from his coat away, and I saw that it was no longer white but crimson. He replaced it with a new one.

"…There's no paramagic for this, is there? And where's Squall?"

"He went in before me and he didn't come back out."

"Dangit! I'm going after him –right now-!" I heard the worry in her voice, making me suspect that she had feelings for Squall.

"Be careful Selphie." Seifer warned her.

Darkness tinged the edges of my vision.

"Hang in there, Sierra. We're going back to Garden."

I clutched at his coat. "Seifer?"

"What is it?"

"….Don't tell Cid what I am."

"…I won't, Sierra… I won't."

I let myself be comforted by the warm blanket of unconsciousness.


	9. Goodbye

(a/n:…. You know the drill. Don't own square, don't own 8. feh. I'm sorry if anyone's out of character. So sue me. I'm 13. By the way, there's a very faint Squall/Selphie in this chapter! Squall fangirls like myself, do not kill me! I know Squall belongs to us, but he and Selphie are cute, too! I heart Squall. bursts into tears Sorry…. Sorry, read on to find it out…)

_I walked through the monotonous swirls of multiple shades of black, brown, and gray. Images danced before my eyes, ones I didn't wish to see. I walked and walked and walked and just didn't get anywhere…where was I? I sank to my knees, unable to move. A tall brown-eyed blonde stood over me. I recognized him as Landon Almasy, Seifer's older brother. He smirked in a most intimidating fashion, and I winced. _

_"Ultemecia already has a sorceress knight…"_

_"Who?" My voice wavered._

_"Me." He smiled cruelly and tried to stab me again, but I woke up to a tearful exclamation of my name._

"Sierra! Wake up!" sobbed Selphie.

"What is it?" I mumbled, moaning. My stomach ached.

"Squall's…. he's…" she couldn't finish.

"Squall's what?" I asked, disoriented from having just woken up.

"Oh, Sierra! Sir Laguna is—"

"Laguna Loire…? What about him? Is he okay?" At hearing my dad's name I kind of snapped out of it.

"Sir Laguna's all freaked out because Squall's…. y'know… he's here, Sierra. Sir Laguna wants to talk to you."

"Sefie, you're not making any sense…"

She darted out of the room, and there was a quiet knock before Dad walked in, a sad, pained expression on his face.

"What happened, Dad?" I whispered.

Dad sank down next to me, running a hand through his hair, sighing.

"I… found out about Squall today. I mean, I didn't even know I –had- a son till this morning when they found him… and couldn't identify him, and did a DNA search. Squall, your brother…" he seemed to be struggling to get the words out, and I wondered what he meant when he'd said, 'they found him', "….is dead."

It was too surprising to sink in. "….What?"  
"They took him prisoner… and then a sorceress named Ultemecia found him."

"What…? Why'd they have to DNA test him?"

"…what was left of him." Was all Dad would say for a long time. He was struggling with this, but it hadn't quite sank in for met yet because he had been the most powerful SeeD in Garden, and the fear Ultemecia had instilled in me grew. "…He was…. Mangled."

I winced. "Omigosh… I am –so sorry-…" I felt responsible, and tears streamed down my face. I struggled to sit up, looking at Dad.

"…He was a part of Raine, just like you…" he shook his head, more talking to himself than me, reaching over and hugging me, and I felt even worse. I buried my head in his shoulder. "It's okay, Sierra. It's okay." He whispered to me, trying to reassure himself as well as me. He embraced me for a long time before Dr. Kadowaki came in and ushered him out, saying I needed to rest.

I didn't want to be alone…. Not knowing that my brother was dead because of me. So instead of sleeping I laid there with my arms wrapped around the pillow, crying uncontrollably. I don't know how long that lasted, but I soon drifted off to sleep, a miserable, light sleep.

_I woke up with someone hanging over me with his arms crossed. He smiled faintly._

_"Hey, Sierra." It was Squall._

_"You're alive!" I shrieked, throwing my arms around him._

_"No. Just snapping you out of it. It wasn't your fault."_

_"You're…?"_

_"Yeah. But you need to know that it's not your fault."_

_"It was!"_

_"It wasn't." He said firmly. "I wish I woulda known who you were sooner. I'm sorry." He brushed my bangs outta my face. "I didn't wanna leave yet… I just thought I needed to visit you one last time."_

_"If you're still sticking around—"_

_"No, I can't come back. But I'll –always- watch over you, Sierra." He said reassuringly. "…Will you tell Selphie that I love her?"_

_"Yes." I felt my throat tighten, making it hard to talk. _

_"…Thanks. Already talked to Laguna. We're square now." He nodded, as if finishing his business and getting ready to move on._

_"…So you hung around—"_

_"To do unfinished things. I wish I could talk to Selphie myself." He sighed, staring at the ceiling. "…I'm sorry. I shouldn't be this way."_

_"Squall…"_

_"I have to go now. Just… take care, Sierra." He squeezed my hand. "I'm sorry I didn't get to know you. Goodbye, Sierra." He faded away, and I attempted to jump up after him, but a searing pain enveloped me, starting at my stomach and spreading._

I woke up with a start. It was a dream…. It was all a dream.

(a/n: I am SOOOO SORRY! I just had to make this happen… my poor Squall…

Squall:….sure. That's why you killed me. turns away

Sefie Lynne Tilmitt: for really! I love you!

Squall:…whatever.

But for really, don't hurt me… I just… this had to happen. Please don't be mad at me and continue to read!)


	10. Panic

Chapter 10

When I woke up, after I got over my dream, or whatever it was that Squall visited me in, I realized there was someone beside me, even though Dr. Kadowaki had strongly advised that no one should come in. I looked over and saw Seifer, sleeping sitting up in an uncomfortable infirmary chair, his head on his chest. I watched him breathe in and out peacefully, content to simply know he was there with me. What was he dreaming about? I really did wonder.

Was he dreaming about his past, like I did so often? Maybe his brother, or his parents? Or bloody battles that haunted nightmares that chased me so often? Was he dreaming about his friends, like when I dreamed Sarah transferred here and she and I and Selphie were all best friends again? Or was he dreaming about someone that meant a lot to him, like I dreamed of him sometimes? Was he dreaming about me? He seemed so happy, so peaceful. I sighed, hugging the pillow tighter and closing my eyes.

As I gazed at him, I remembered from the start thinking he was decently cute... But now, with his blonde bangs messilly falling over his closed eyes, for once not slicked back, and the thin scar stretching across his forehead... with his long white trench coat, and his gunblade at his side... He seemed like the most wonderful person I had ever met. Handsome, caring, kind, protective...

I smiled faintly. It had started off as one of those fuzzy feelings, like a schoolgirl's crush... but now, it seemed like that warm, fuzzy feeling he gaze me just kept growing and growing. I reached over and took Seifer's hand in mine. Seifer stirred slightly.

"What the hell... go bother Quistis, I'm on a date..." he mumbled, scowling in his sleep, and I couldn't supress a giggle, "I said go away... ignore him, Sierra..."

"Seifer," I shook my head.

"...Huh...?" he asked blearilly, awakened by my giggle, eyes openned only slightly. He ran a hand through his hair.

"Good morning," I said cheerfully.

"Sierra... you okay?" Seifer yawned.

I thought he looked really cute, all bleary-eyed and dazed, seeming like a sleepy little kid. But then again, he was always cute, and only I, with my twisted mind, could think of him 'cute, being all bleary eyed and dazed, like a sleepy little kid'. But whatever. Being a little twisted wasn't so bad, right?

"Yeah," I smiled brightly at him. He had the most beautiful eyes, even though I'd never tell him that.

"Good. Damn Landon, just you wait till I jump his case..."

I debated whether to tell him about my dream where Landon was a sorceress knight, but decided against it.

"Yeah," I muttered.

"Who shoved a stick up _his_ ass?" grumbled Seifer, "He's never to lay a finger on you again."

I couldn't help but smile at his protectiveness over me. It kind of surprised me that Seifer could like a plain, drab old girl like me. I was the _image_ of plain and simple, yet he seemed to dare I say itlove me. It was so rash, I realized suddenly, to assume he loved me after knowing me only a short period of time. I cursed myself for my stupidity.

"Something wrong, Sierra?"

"No," I murmured, suddenly feeling sick.

"Okay... tell me if there's anything you need."

I made sure to nod before closing my eyes. He squeezed my hand, making my pulse race, but not unpleasantly so. He made me all... fluttery. Dunno how, but he did. I sighed, remembering when, in a moment of idiocricy, I had told him I loved him. I searched my mind thoroughly, trying to remember what he had said in response. ...'I love you, too'. Was it my hopeful imagination, or did he really say it? Wishful thinking, I thought sadly to myself with a concious sigh. Cripes. I was obsessed with this guy... he was all I ever thought about anymore.

I had my eyes closed, but it was if I had suddenly openned them, because I saw... something. It was a blinding white light, then total darkness. It had started to rain crystaline drops, like shattered glass, shimmering and catching light like prisms, sending rainbows flashing everywhere. But no matter how pretty it looked, my common sense told me to get away. This was most definetly dangerous. Like, on the level 'get-outta-there-now-your-next-breath-depends-on-it'. I looked around for Seifer frantically.

Was that how I worked now? When in danger look for Seifer, because he'll help? Goddangit, I was becoming so dependent! I winced, then searched for Seifer. Gone. He was gone! I reached out, shivering. Where was he? I closed my eyes. It was beautiful, but I was scared, I dunno why, and I wanted out of there A.S.A.P. What was going on? Blackness, which surrounded me, seemed to tear into me, and I thrashed about, searching for a way out.

When I openned my eyes again, I was in Seifer's arms. His face was a couple inches from mine, etched with panic and worry. He held me on his lap, his arms in a firm circle around me, pinning my arms to my sides. I felt exhausted as I did when I got possessed. I sighed, weary to much for words, letting my head fall back onto his shoulder.

"What happened? Are you okay?"

"...Dunno... I'm fine... Why are you...?"

"Because you were just laying there, and then you kinda yelled my name and started shouting and trembling and kicking and... yeah... I was trying to keep you calm..." he almost let go of me, but I put my hands on his, not minding his arms encircling my waist. I saw his features change, his expression going from embarrassed to surprised to happy.

"...Thankyou."

"So what was going on, anyway?"

"I was... dreaming..." I struggled to find the words.

"What kind of dream could be that bad...?" he observed me worriedly.

"I was... alone. In pitch black. There was a flash of light, then it was a pretty shiny-like rain, multicolored and sparkly and stuff... and... I'm not making any sense..." I sighed, and he leaned forward, so his forehead rested against mine.

"You won't ever be alone if I can help it, Sierra."

I blinked up at him, surprised. He smiled. He was, what, an inch away? I soaked up his handsome expression. So I was a glutton for punishment. So I had been hurt before. Seifer was different. I knew it. I smiled at him, and my heart raced as he leaned forward, and I knew he was about to kiss me. Wow. I closed my eyes, heart thumping loudly and

"GUYS!" exclaimed Sefie, who had just ran in. Seifer jumped, in turn causing me to slide off of his lap and land uncerimoniously in the floor, sprawled out.

"Shit!" Seifer muttered, offering me his hand.  
"Oooooh, was I interupting anything?" Selphie giggled, "I'll leave you two alone now..."

"No, what did you want?" I took Seifer's hand and got to my feet. Between paramagic and Dr. Kadowaki's excellent work, I was feeling okay. Not totally, as Starla would say, 'spiffy', but I was okay.

"Oh," Sefie blinked, "Um, Headmaster Cid just wanted to speak to Seifer... that's all. But he says it can wait till you're done visiting Sierra. So take your time," she beamed all-knowingly. Sometimes I felt like hitting her... cripes... "I'll see you two later."

"No, no... I'll go see Cid now." Seifer nodded as if nothing had happened, which kind of bothered me. "Take care, Sierra."

He smiled at me, waving and walking off. He looked back over his shoulder once, and I, much to even my own surprise, grinned and blew him a kiss. Seifer just kind of gave me a secretive 'later' smile, like he would later, y'know, give me that kiss he'd attempted as SEFIE BURST IN. Crap... crapcrapcrap! I laughed a little, sinking back down on the infirmary bed. Dr. Kadowaki came in, her eyebrows raised, but she was to nice to ask exactly what had happened.

"How much longer will I have to stay here?"

"Until tomorrow, Sierra."

"Okay, okay..." I grumbled, then brightened, "Wanna play triple triad?"

We played, and I lost my Selphie card to her, which really cheesed me off. Really. So I kept pestering her to play again, and she always insisted on the random rule. Part of me believed, for a while, that she had taken the Selphie card totally out of her deck, because, y'know, she knew I wanted it _back. BAD. _Cause I promised Selphie I would never lose her card. I had been the Card Queen in Trabia. But Kadowaki caught me off guard once. And after about three straight hours of triple triading, I finally won it back. She sighed, rolling her eyes and insisting that I leave her alone and that she had better things to do than play triple triad with a random student. I openned my laptop, which Sefie had brought in for me.

SLoire: Yoo-hoo, anyone there?

SefieStar: Explain

SLoire: ...Cruds.

SefieStar: Hehehehe! Tell me! Tell me!

SLoire: Um...no.

SefieStar: Awww, puh-lease? puppy dog eyes

SLoire: I was just having a bad dream, and I freaked out and started yelling and fighting and Seifer was trying to calm me down.

SefieStar: Sure. Since, y'know, he was about to KISS you.

SLoire: shuddup.

SefieStar: c'mon, gimme the scoop!

SLoire:...you won't believe what happened.

SefieStar: waits impatiently for Sierra to continue...

SLoire: Squall visited me in a dream. Said he had to say goodbye and that it wasn't my fault and such. And he told me to tell you he loved you.

SefieStar: stop, Sierra. it's not funny. teasing me like that is really mean, okay?

SLoire: I'm serious!

SefieStar: I said stop it! That's really jerky, saying you've got a message from a dead person I liked.

SLoire: For really!

SefieStar: Just shut up.

SefieStar logged off.

&#!&...! I muttered angrilly.

Cripes that just sucked! Sucked sucked SUCKED! Sefie was mad at me, Seifer would probably never LOOK at me again, and I had a -hole- in my stomach. You've heard of 'yeh know yer a readneck when'? Well, 'yeh know yer life sucks when'... I sighed, leaning back, deciding since, y'know, it was 10:38 I should really get some sleep. I rolled over, shivering and pulling the blankets tighter around my shoulders, falling into a restless sleep.


	11. Fear

Chapter 11

The morning sunshine shown through the window above the bed of the infirmary. I woke up and looked at the ceiling for a while, content not to think for a bit. Ah, ignorance is bliss. I smiled as I soaked in the sunlight. I felt good, considering two days ago I had been stabbed in the stomach by Seifer Almasy's lunatic brother. I saw a single vase beside my bed, and blinked, then pinched myself to see if I was really awake. I was, I thought, irritated as I rubbed my arm where I'd decided to pinch myself. In the vase was one red rose, and a red ribbon was tied around the vase. No card, but I knew who it was from.

"Seifer," I laughed softly, standing up and sniffing at the rose. It was really pretty and I loved the way roses smelled...

I decided I couldn't live without herbal tea one minute longer (Orange Zinger is the only kind I could drink. Buy it at Kroger. It tastes really freaking good.) and I went to tell Dr. Kadowaki that I was leaving. She actually approved, nodding at me. I smiled and waved, the single vase in my hand. I'd sit it in my room, and once it started to wilt I'd just press it. I was smarter than death, but only when it came to flowers. I dropped off the rose, and then went to the coffee shop where they also sold hot tea. Thank God, dunno what I'd do without it.

I sank down at my usual table. Up until last year, I had been on a coffee kick, but then Dad told me that coffee made your hair turn gray early and I almost instantly quit. Only after I was broken did he mention that he'd conveniently forgotten to tell me that he was only joking, and by that time I had moved past coffee and onto herbal tea. See where it landed me? I had a fettish for all things that had caffine and such. I guess since it was a drug ((A/n: for really, caffine is classified as a drug. I am not lying. funky, neh?)) I had gotten... stuck on it. Ah well.

I stirred my hot tea with a coffee stir, even though -looking- at a coffee stir made me crave coffee, which I sworn on my life I'd never get addicted to again. I propped my head up on my hand, watching the tea swirl around, steam coming off of it. I had an odd, ominous feeling in my stomach, but I didn't know why... I hated not knowing why, I really did.

"Hey Sierra." Seifer said from behind me, sounding rather nervous.

"Seifer," I smiled, pleasantly surprised, "Thanks for the rose. I loved it."

"Oh... you're welcome. You... gotta get outta here. Ultemecia... she's back."

"What the"

"Come on! No time to waste, I'll tell you some other time, just -go pack- and meet me at the gates in half an hour. Be careful!" he instructed.

I let the horror sink in. _Ultemecia was -back-. _She knew that a woman I had recently found to be Edea Kramer died and passed her powers on to someone, and that someone was me, and Ultemecia knew now just how easilly she could conrtrol me... She knew that I was a sorceress surrounded by -thousands- of sorceress assassins. And she knew she could make me do simply anything, even kill my friends. Gulp. I jumped up as the shock kind of sunk in. I ran as fast as I could, ditching the tea and dashing to my dorm, panicked, gathering random items I'd need.

I got as much Gil as I could carry, as well as my big sword and as many clothes as I could fit into a Punk Rock Hello Kitty bag I bought from Hot Topic. I closed my eyes, trying something I had never tried... Using sorceress powers on purpose. A crystal casing engulfed my rose, making it look like a simple glass orniment. I sighed, putting it gently into my bag and running out the door, hurrying to the gates. I felt like everyone was -looking- at me... staring at me, like they knew what I was. I put my head down and ran harder until I saw Seifer. He caught my hand, seeing my freaked out expression.

"You okay?"

"Gotta be. I'm leaving."

"_We're _leaving. C'mon."

Seifer gestured towards a black, inconsipiciuos car. I smiled slightly, relieved, hopping in on the passenger side. Seifer got in on the other side, going from zero to seventy in, like, seven seconds. Which is pretty scary when you're a 5' 5", naueseated teenage girl. I felt my stomach tightly knot with fear. I leaned forward, laying my head on the dashboard and sighing.

"What is it?"

"...Everything is upside down, Seifer. Sefie is mad at me, Squall is dead, Sarah forgot her two best friends exsisted, I went from a perfect, uneventful life and then... whoosh... here comes along this sorceress business and **POOF!**, it's like everything's changed... I mean, look at me! I'm running away from a Garden, and Igrew up in a Garden, and I know that the sorceress Ultemecia can control me with a -word-... she does to. It's scary, for goodness sakes... egad, Seifer, this is just so hard..." I sighed, letting a single tear run down my face. I felt him reach over and wipe the tear from my face.

"Sierra... is all of it so bad? Maybe you've lost a little, but you've gained a little too, right?"

"Yeah... yeah, sure..." I muttered, sitting back and turning my face away from him.

This was to hard to handle. Mom, Squall... can you hear me... up there in heaven? I need help...

I need someone.

"Listen up, Sierra Loire," He said suddenly, his voice sharp, and he actually pulled over and turned to look at me, "So what? Your destiny is untold. Your future is unknown. But what fun would life be if nothing was ever new or exciting? I mean, -look-. You can either _stay in your shell, protected but never experiencing life and love, _or you can _get out and try -new things-. _It might be a little scary, and at times dangerous, but it can also be wonderful. You can't tell me you've not tried one good thing since your life started to change. Seriously. Name three things that your thankful for."

"'Your destiny is untold'... I thought you didn't believe in destiny."

"I didn't... until I met you. Before that, I couldn't have cared less... It was all a load of shit to me. But then I met you and everything -changed-... But name three things you're thankful for now."

"I'm thankful for... in the order from least to greatest... meeting new people... seeing new sights... and meeting you."

He leaned over and kissed me on the cheek. "See? That wasn't so hard, now was it?"

I smiled a little. "No... not at all."

After three long hours in a car with Seifer Almasy acting like an idiot because he was trying to cheer me up, my patience was wearing pretty thin. I sat with my head back and my eyes closed, feeling like curling up in some hidey hole and never coming back out again. Ultemecia... where was she now? She could just... take me over. Just like that. I knew it, but it scared me all the same. I mean, what if she took me over and made me hurt Seifer?

"...Seifer?" My own voice sounded soft and weak. I didn't like that one bit... not one little bit at all.

"Yeah?" he said, in a falsely cheerful voice.

"...I wanna go to Esthar..."

"What the"

"...No, Seifer. For really. Cripes... Can't you see all the awful things she could make me do? It'd... be best."

"I won't let you get sealed!"

"...Seifer..."

"Damnit! Sierra, why are you constantly pulling this shit on me! You're always depessed about something or another, and you're all I got left and I won't let you get sealed!"

I closed my eyes, trying not to cry. (8)Take me away... take me far away from here, I will run with you(8)... Seifer... I had expected you to be my knight in shining armor. Why...? Why didn't it work out? Was it because I'm a sorcerss? Was it because I did something wrong? I felt him reach over for my hand but I pulled back.

"...Look, Sierra," he sighed, "I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have gotten angry... but we're not going to Esthar." he said flatly.

Neither of us talked for a long time, but eventually we stopped at a house out of the way, out in what Dad used to laugh and call 'no-man's land'. Basically in the middle of freaking nowhere. Seifer stopped the car and looked over at me.

"Stay here. Gotta make sure who's here."

He got out of the car, motioning for me to lock it. The part of me that was still kind of cheesed off at him told me not to, but my common sense made me lock the doors. I sat in the car, and ten minutes later he came back out, taking my backpack from me and linking his arm through mine. Seifer escorted me to the house. I looked up, surprised at how his face captured my attention.

I had never noticed how tired he looked sometimes in moments of stress, his pale face beaten and worn by a hundred foes of the past. I felt slightly guilty at being mad at him. His eyes shone brightly, though, and he felt me gazing at him. Suddenly I stared at my shoelaces, biting my lip.  
"Thanks for getting my bag," I said softly.

"No problem." He smiled over at me. "This house... It belongs to my best friend and his sister, Spencer and Teal. They'll understand... Teal is a sorceress. She has to live under the strain of sorceress bangles. She can definetly relate to your situation. No one really knows this house is here... it's in the stix (a/n: my word for the middle of nowhere) and no one would think to look for you here. Make yourself comfortable, we might be here for a while. However long it takes until the Ultemecia threat is gone. Oh, and I'm warning you... Spencer and Teal are slightly... eccentric." He smiled fondly and openned the front door.

Two people sat at the kitchen table playing chess. The girl had dyed lime-green hair that was tamed into a ponytail, and she was wearing a black summer dress and knee-length purple socks. Around her wrist, though, I saw a silvery, shining bangle. I shuddered. The boy had lots of spiky black hair and brilliantly bright green eyes. He grinned up.  
"Ah, Seifer! I didn't think you'd ever come to visit! And may I ask who this lovely lady with you is?"  
Before I could answer, Seifer lowered his voice and said, "Sierra Loire. She's a sorceress currently being sought out by Ultemecia."

"Ahhhh, I see! Feel free to stay as long as you need to."

"I'm Teal." The girl jumped up so fast it seemed like she had springs on her feet. "It's nice to meet you, Sierra! Lemme show you your room. It's next to mine." She snatched my bag from Seifer and marched me into the next room.

I grinned at him, trying not to laugh. I had a feeling this was going to be fun.


	12. In the Box

"Mweh heh heh!" Teal was sitting at the table, a Kuroneko-sama backpack over her shoulders and her Kyo hat on her head (a/n: from trigun and fruitsbasket, if you've never heard of them then don't ask, but they're bloody brilliant, go read them sometime!).  
"This is so hard," I moaned.  
Seifer, who sat next to me, grinned. Under the table he put one hand on my knee. "C'mon, it's fun."

I knew what he was doinghe was passing me a card. I reached under the table to adjust the jacket tied around my waist and took the card from his hand. Y'see, we were all playing a card gameDuel Monstersand it was sooo fun, but it took some getting used to. Seifer and I were on one team, Teal and Spencer were on the other.

"Huzzah! Beat this!" cackled Teal madly, slapping down a combo that ended the game.

As it turned out, spending time here was the most fun I'd ever had. I did get restless, though... it was my second day not leaving that house. We had been here _two whole days_ and I hadn't been outside _once_. Grrr. I looked to Seifer, a pleading look in my eyes. He averted his gaze, which meant 'not a chance, but I feel guilty telling you no.' I sighed.

"Teal" I began, but Seifer caught my arm in midsentence.

He knew that if Teal took me outside, then we'd most likely get lost, seeing as neither of us had any directional skills whatsoever and we were miles from civilization.

"I'll take you outside," he sighed reluctantly.

Did I have to have someone with me at all times? Everyone was breathing down my neck. I needed my space... I felt smothered, with them all covertly watching me. Some people would feel safer, but that constant vigilance bothered me.

"Thankyou," I muttered.

He opened the doorit was dark outside, but the stars shone brilliantly and fireflies floated around us.

"So... you were going stir-crazy already?" he smiled grimly at me.

"Yes," I replied bluntly.  
"I'm just warning you, Sierrawe might be out here for a long time."  
"We're in the middle of nowhere. How dangerous can it be for me to go out on my own once in a while, Seifer? So much has happened in the past week. I need... time to think."

He sensed my distress and slipped his arms around my waist. I was facing away, but I could almost feel his bright eyes on me. Seifer drew me close to him.

"Close your eyes, and take a deep breath."  
I did so. "This isn't helping."  
"What will?"  
"Civilization. A nice, long, hot shower. Time to talk to Sefie."  
"How about a kiss?"  
That caught me off guard. "W-what?"

"Will a kiss make you feel better?" he smiled at me.  
"If you're asking my permission, go for it. But I think I'll be a terrible kisser."

He chuckled. "I somehow doubt that."

I was glad I carried my bag with me. I pulled out my hit-clips-radio-thingy and turned it on, grinning. It was tuned to one of those soft-rock stations and was playing 'Have I Told You Lately' by Rod Stewart. He laughed but looked thoroughly embarrassed that I carried my miniradio everywhere with me.

"Viola!" I said proudly.  
"Okay," he sighed. "Are you done being melodramatic?"  
"I just want to, y'know, play a fluffy song for a fluffy moment," I said defensively.

Seifer leaned forward and kissed me. One thing's for sureI'll never forget _that_. Needless to say, he asked me out.

"May I have this dance?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.  
I nodded, smiling, blushing, wishing more than _anything_ Selphie could see me right now. My cell phone vibrated, but I ignored it. I rested my head on his chest, and I felt his chin resting lightly on my hair. It was perfectand then I heard it. A faint, sickly sweet laugh in the back of my mind. I froze.

"Sierra, what's wrong?"  
My knees went weak, and I couldn't talk. I mouthed wordlessly, trying to warn him. My legs buckled and I fell into him. He caught me, looking alarmed, and held me. I wanted to scream, _drop me, I'm getting possessed, _but it wasn't that simple.

"Sierra!"

"Ulteme..." That was all I could get out. My voice cracked, then faltered all together.

_My dear, sweet child. Why do you fear me so? _

_Because you killed my brother. _

I felt drunkI was watching through my eyes, but everything was blurred at the edges and someone else was in control.

"What is it, Seifer?" Ultemecia said in my voice. I wanted to be sick.

"Sierra, are you okay?"  
"Mm hm," she smiled.

I tried to scream, warn him, _anything_. I willed my legs to move, but they stood firmher will was a thousand times stronger than mine. He looked at me suspiciously.

"Whatever you say..."

"What's the matter, Seifer?" she asked innocently. "Is something bothering you?"  
"You... you..." he struggled to find words.  
"What about me?" she twisted my face into a confused, hurt look, and I wanted to kill her. I had never hated that strongly. I wanted to _kill_ her.

"You aren't..." he started, then stopped.

"You're much smarter than I gave you credit for." She smiled a wide, toadlike smile. "You thought you could hide her from me? She is my vessela little tool. I'm always connected to her, like a killer connected to their victim... a tie that can never become worn down or severed."

You should have taken me to Esthar, Seifer, I wanted to cry. He tried to come up with a solution, biting his lip.

"You can have her," he muttered.

"Now that's a good boy," she smiled again. "Run along and pretend you didn't see anything."

"Okay. How am I supposed to explain what happened to Sierra?" he looked coldly amused. I wanted to die. Seifer... how could you?

"Tell them she needed some time alone... she went on a walk, but not very far. She'll be back soon."

"Alright." Seifer turned around and walked off casually.

My heart was broken in two. I wanted to cry. I was shattered. I had taken all that I couldand I gave up.

(a/n: Seifer's point of view!)

I ran to the house, panic ballooning inside my chest and threatening to swallow me whole. It had workedUltemecia believed that I didn't care what happened to Sierra. It was part of my plan... I had to get Teal. She was a sorceress. She'd know what to do. I burst through the door. Spencer blinked.

"What's wrong with you, man?"

"Teal! Where's Teal!"  
"Oooh! Oooh! Here's Teal!" said Teal excitedly, poking her head through the doorway. "What does Seifer need?"  
"Sierra! Ultemecia got her!"

"Ooooooooh, that's bad news, Ulty is scary."

"Don't just stand there!" I yelled in anguish. It had hurt to fake that I didn't care.

"I can't sense her signal," Teal said softly.

"What's that mean?"  
"She's... asleep."

"WHAT!"  
"Ulty put her _there_..." Teal shuddered.  
"Where!"

"Ulty put her in the darkness of the human mind... she's trapped. It's like a severe, sorceress-induced form of schizophrenia, or even autism. Sometimes it's so bad, the person regresses and then it just stops, and they never wake up. It's soooo scary. The human mind is a scary, scary place. It's so hard to escape."

I could tell by the look on Spencer's face that Teal had been there. "What do the sorceresses call it?"  
"The sorceress said to me, 'I put you in the box, and now you can't get out'. And those were the last words I heard for three years." She was shaking, which surprised me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.  
"I have to find Sierra, I can't let her go through that!" Teal suddenly burst out.

She ran out the door, and I followed her. Spencer was close on my heels. The darkness was complete outside. The stars had seemed to have dimmed from their former glory. Teal took a deep breath and walked in one direction, occasionally taking a random turn.

"I'm getting a strong sorceress signal," she muttered. "From that bunch of trees over there. Do you have your weapons?"  
"Yes," Spencer and I chorused.

"I have a few spare bangles, but I'm afraid to use them. They might hurt Sierra more, so I can't use them. But I have my hand gun, and if things get desperate, I'll use it."  
"You mean we might have to" I began, shocked.  
"We might have to hurt her. It may be the only way to weaken the sorceress enough for me to force her out."

"Oh." I squeezed my eyes shut. The memory of my brother stabbing her was fresh in my mind.

"Don't worry, Seify, it'll be fine. Sierra's a tough girl..." Teal said, but by her tone of voice, I could tell that Teal wasn't at all sure that Sierra was going to ever be okay again.

"I hope," I said, drawing a shaking breath.

A ringing voice came from the trees. "Ahhh, I knew you were to weak to walk away from her."

I whirled around to face the trees, cursing under my breath. She had known my plan the whole time. "Damn..."

"No need for language, Seifer," she smiled sweetly, walking out of the trees.

I knew that it wasn't Sierra, but seeing Sierra's body, her smiling face, made me fall into a deep spasm of anger and fear. How could she steal the body of my Sierra? I closed my eyes and took another shuddering breath, trying to stay calm.

"Let her go right now, or I'll track you down, and I will _kill _you."  
"**_I_** am not the one who did the most damage here... it was you."

"Stop with your sick mind games!"

She laughed. "Don't you see, my dear boy? She has given up! She's dying... and I am not the cause. She's been through so much heartbreak, she just couldn't take you acting as if you didn't care. Physical damage is a small, trifling subject compared to emotional damage. She's been dumped, she's lost her brother, and at one point she was raped and had a stalker. She just couldn't handle your rejection. She can't hear anything you say, can't see you. She'll just lie inside, dying. If I ever do let her go, she'll be just as I left her... locked in that tiny box in her head."

"Let her out!" I yelled at the top of my voice.

Spencer had to grab my arm to keep me from doing anything stupid. I had no idea her past was so rough... why didn't she tell me? I had just added to her hurt... And maybe my plan to help had only done more damage.

"What if I just... let her go? She'll be a vegetable. Nothing can bring her out..."  
"Something can," said Teal boldly.

"Something none of you have to give," said Ultemecia/Sierra smoothly. "I think I'll leave her to rot..."  
"No!" I cried in complete loss. "You can't do that!"  
"Watch me..." and Sierra crumpled to the ground. Her eyes were open, and her mouth was stuck in that smile that had melted my heart, but hurt worse than ever now because I knew that smile was forced by Ultemecia.

I pulled her against me. "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, wake up..." I burried my face in her hair.

Her eyes are what scared me most. They were empty holes, no longer the shining diamonds I remembered that captured my heart. They stared accusingly up at me. I cried, my tears falling and beading on her hair. Teal knelt and shook Sierra's shoulders.  
"Don't fret precious, I'm here, step away from the window," I whispered waveringly, hoping above all else that she could hear me. The song wasn't all that nice, but that line was romantic, and I wanted her know that I loved her. "And..." I thought of another song. "You're my survival, you're my living proof, my love is alive and not dead."

"What are you doing?" Spencer asked.

"I'm trying to get her to respond."  
"She won't"

"She will."

"Whatever you say man," he muttered, putting his hands in his pockets. I knew that he was reliving his sister being 'in the box'.

"And remember what I said... Your destiny is untold. Your future is unknown. But what fun would life be if nothing was ever new or exciting? You'll never be able to experience anything new and exciting if you don't wake up... I want to be with you for the rest of my life, Sierra... Please, wake up. For me."

I didn't feel anything at first, then... I felt a small tug at my shirt sleeve. I looked down, alarmed and hopeful. Her eyes were closed, but her hand was trembling.

"...S..."  
"TEAL! SPENCER! SHE'S OKAY!" I yelled, making them jump.

"Sei... Seifer..."  
"Oh, God, Sierra, I didn't really mean it, you know I didn't." I hugged her tightly. "You scared the shit out of me. I was just trying to get help for you. I didn't mean to hurt you... I had no idea... of all those damn hardships in your past... But I want to help you get over that, I want to help you create good memories to cover up all the bad ones."

"I love you, Seifer," she mumbled into my shirt. "Thankyou... For saving me."

I played with her hair absently. "Sierra... I think you saved me more than I saved you." I picked her up and was surprised that she didn't object. She must have been really exausted.

We walked off toward the house... I had a feeling that the threat was over though... and I could live the rest of my life with Sierra.


	13. Epilouge

I looked in the mirror, observing myself. My hair was now cut short, framing my face and falling just above my shoulders. I had to wear my glasses and a sorceress bangle on my wrist. But considering those facts (along with the little factor of me being pregnant), I didn't look to bad, even after being married to Seifer Almasy for five years.

"Mommy, Mommy!" my four year old little girl, Christina, ran into the room. "Aunt Sefie's here, and she's brought Elsy and Laurie and Squall!"

In case no one knew, Selphie had moved on past Squall, even though she named her son after him. She was no longer sad about it, but sometimes she still got that nostalgic look on her face, and I knew she was thinking about him. But she had a husband and three children to deal with, so she hardly had the time to be sad about Squall.

I smiled down lovingly at Christina. She had brownish-blonde, curly hair and Seifer's bright blue eyes. I picked her up and she hugged me. There was nothing like not living in fear of a sorceress possesing you... and knowing that you had a life with a beautiful, wonderful future ahead of you.

"C'mon, Chrissy, let's go. Daddy'll want to get a picture of us all."

I walked downstairs, the wedding photo of Seifer and I still laying on the dresser.


End file.
